What The Christmas?
What The Christmas? 🎄🎙️
It’s the holidays, and somehow we made it… together. In this special What The Christmas?episode, Sammie, Jake, and Don hit pause on the chaos, the absurdity, and the everyday “what the fuck” moments to do something a little different—say thank you.
This episode is all about gratitude. Gratitude for the listeners who found us, stuck with us, shared us, laughed with us, and made our very first year of this podcast possible. From the bottom of our slightly inappropriate hearts, we talk about what this year has meant to us, how unreal it still feels to be doing this, and why this community is the best damn part of the whole thing.
Whether you’ve been here since episode one or you just stumbled in wondering what the fuck this is all about—this episode is for you.
So pour a drink, grab some questionable holiday leftovers, and spend a little time with us as we celebrate the season, the year, and you.
From all of us at What The Fuck—thank you, and What The Christmas? 🎄
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I just want to watch Walter Cronkite, you f***ing
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bitch. No offense, no offense old dudes. Would
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you hit it? Yeah, I'd hit it. Okay, nice. That's
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what I want to hear. My name's Dylan, but I go
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by Dildo. Say that's what I'm saying. Big bad
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Bill is sweet, William now Just slap me in
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the f***ing meat, you know, in the pie hole.
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I'm Jake Jacobs. This is Sammie This is the Don.
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And you're listening to What the F***? Welcome
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to What the Fuck, the podcast where we say all
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the things you're thinking. But you better not
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fucking do it because Santa Claus is listening.
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He doesn't like ugly. He is. Don't do it, it's
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a trap. Fuck yeah, it is. So, uh... Christmas
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2025. It is a year later. What the fuck just
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celebrated a birthday? A fuck -aversary, if you
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will. A fuck -aversary. Shit -show -aversary.
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A shit -show -aversary, yeah. I'll tell you what.
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It has been just slightly over a year. Yeah.
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And to this fucking day out there in what -the
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-fuck land, we have never, Jake and I have never
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laid eyes personally on Sammy. We have not. Not
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one fucking time. One day. Someday. But we literally
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have never been in the same room as Samantha.
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We just want to thank you for listening to us
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for the last year. Don, Sammy, and I have a lot
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of fun every week doing this. We get a lot of
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shit off our chest. And by the time it gets to
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you, a lot of stuff is edited out. And maybe
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at some point you might hear some of that stuff.
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But what I want to tell you tonight is you guys
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have a very Merry Christmas. Thank you for listening,
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and have a great 2026. That was nice. Thank you.
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It was nice. Yeah, Liz and everybody out there,
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thanks for putting up with us on the airwaves
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for a little over a year. And as we come into
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the end of 2025, don't forget the reason for
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the season. Merry Christmas. Have a happy new
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year. Spend some quality time with your family
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and enjoy each other. Think of things that are
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positive. Be full of gratitude. Just be genuine
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going into this next year. And go read a fucking
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book instead of listening to this shit show.
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We love you guys. Thank you all. Make sure it's
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smut. Make sure it's monster smut, by the way.
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That's right. I second what the boys have said.
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We appreciate all of you that listen and we love
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making this content for you guys. To add to that,
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I guess from my millennial brain, may your pillow
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always be on the cool side. May your soda always
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be carbonated and may you never step on a Lego
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a day in your life. Thank you for being awesome
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listeners. I love that.